days that i feel like all i'm doing is laundry, tripping over toys that i just put away, feeding little people that i just fed, breaking up fights, saying "close the refrigerator", "no, you can't have fruit snacks for breakfast", repeating myself, going to another birthday party, attending another playdate, repeating myself, singing the song from mickey mouse clubhouse, repeating myself and wondering when my last shower was, all while dreaming of lying stretch mark free on a beach somewhere.
we all have those days, right?
please tell me you have those days.
i've been swallowed by those days lately. me and my kids haven't been getting along too well lately. translation: i have had no patience lately and i haven't been the kind of mom that i want to be. i haven't been the kind of mom that i know God wants me to be. that's tough to swallow and it's hard to admit. even more, it's not a fun place to be as a mom.
yesterday lysa terkeurst wrote a great post (like always) and urged her readers to leave a verse that encourages us in times when we are acting less than encouraged. times when we snap at our husbands. times when we want to put a for sale sign around our kids necks and stand them on the corner.
as i read through the comments and verses left by others, i was struck with the realization that the recent struggle between me and my kids has little to do with my kids behavior and more to do with me. the comments and verses reminded me that i can't try and go this alone or my life will be filled with "those days". i don't want that. i don't want that for my kids.
i am a reactor. too often i react to something my kids say or do without thinking about my actions that follow, and too often i end up wishing i would have acted differently.
i want to be a responder. i want to stop, see what God is teaching me and what He wants me to teach my kids. i want to pay attention to what my kids are really saying to me and when i kiss my kids goodnight i want to be thankful, not regretful.
i encourage you to read the post and comments here. lysa was kind enough to quote me here, but more importantly, she reminded us that we are all in this together.
if you're having one of those days and you need a good laugh, go see "confessions of a shopaholic". it is a great movie with a dancing scene that made us laugh so hard we cried! somebody in the theater even snorted and that made us laugh even harder!
happy wednesday!
a
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
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2 comments:
Oh Ang... you know I relate... I think all moms can ... but I feel like I always ask myself "why" why cant we just have some peace in this house... why? Can we have one dinner without crying and drama, Why cant I go one morning without being angry and feeling behind... I now know what my mom must have gone thru with 4 kids and a husband that was either working or at church meetings all the time. I now remember why she once said, " I should just go on strike!" I think we all feel like going on strike but then I just tell myself that it is our 'job" to be that mom ... that mom that teaches our kids to grow up to be good and unselfish adults ... I just hope to start teaching with less angst..."trying is lying" so I guess I better stop trying and do it before these kids are all grown up-B
Ang, I`m not sure I`m going to recognize my friend when I see her. Your spiritual growth is SO evident in your posts and I`m so proud of you!! I love what you wrote and hope to someday follow your advice. I love you and will see you soon. Less than TWO weeks!!
K
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